Archive | 8:33 pm

Not going to talk about soccer… kind of.

27 Jun

I realized that in the two years since I stopped seriously following Premier League action, a lot has happened.

I giggled uncontrollably when I saw this. Seriously, I don’t understand the problem.

NO, I’m not saying cheating on your wife is okay, but it’s like he slept with Wayne Bridge’s girlfriend after they broke up. Well, I do get that Wayne and that chick have a kid together, but like… LOL that’s just kind of funnay just saying.

And of course, you gotta love the fans who have to give him hell for his mistakes.

I thought of something I could talk about.

I went to target with my dad and sister today. We needed to get my sister some toothpaste, and my mom’s been nagging me about helping her get my sister some new swim goggles, so I decided to hit up the goggles aisle. And I found swim caps. And my mom’s been nagging me about swim caps too, so I was like “wow thank you target for once again being my salvation, heck yes for killing two birds with one stone.”

So I get the little junior sized swim cap that’s supposed to be for children 6-14.

My dad takes it out of the little package, since it’s like really easy to open and close and stuff, and he tries to put it on my sister’s head.

HAHAHAHHAHAHA I’M STANDING THERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AISLE LAUGHING MY ASS OFF BECAUSE THE STUPID THING REFUSES TO FIT ON MY SISTER’S HEAD. SHE’S LIKE “WTF DAD WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO” AND MY DAD’S LIKE CRACKING UP AND TRYING TO PULL IT OVER HER HEAD.

And then I’m like “okay, I’ll go grab an adult one, maybe that’ll fit.”

So then I go get it and give it to my dad, and he tries to pull it on my sister’s head again. And it still doesn’t fit.

And then my dad proceeds to claim that swim caps are destructive and will deplete your brain cells and turn your brains to jelly and give you migraines and…

And then he tries to pull the cap over his own head. AND HE LOOKS LIKE SUCH A DOOFUS.

Okay, sorry, it was a you-had-to-be-there moment. But basically I was standing in the middle of the electronics/toy aisle laughing like a madman and people looked at me like one too.

Story of my life right there.

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Sorry, I’m gonna blab about soccer.

27 Jun

Don’t read this if you’re going to get annoyed 😦 I swear I won’t talk about anything but soccer, so you won’t miss out on anything. And seriously, nothing interesting is going on in my life right now, so there isn’t anything else to talk about. To my loyal reader(s) (Emily), I apologize! Check back tomorrow or something… LOL I’ll figure out something else to talk about.

Speaking of Emily, she was such a lovely friend this morning and texted me at 6:39 to ask if I was awake and watching the game. I had set my alarm to 7, which is when kickoff is, but since I was awake, I got myself out of bed and ran to the tv. And I sat there and watched the entire match, including overtime, start to finish. I even woke up my little sister after the second goal. Hehehe -sheepish grin-

Okay, so going into the match, I knew if Ozil, Boateng, and Schweinsteiger were all fit for play, Germany would win, even if Rooney finally decided to show up and start playing worth a damn.

Ozil, Boateng, and Schweinsteiger were all fit for play.

Oh boy… and I mean absolutely and totally fit for play.

I’m not going to lie, the first time I saw Ozil play, I thought he was one of those young naive players that are perky and fun to watch but terrible in terms of self-control and judgment. Like he is absolutely bursting at the seams with energy, and it’s just because he’s 20 or 21. So yeah, he’s fun to watch, but would he really be good enough to help Germany win the world cup?

TODAY, I GOT MY ANSWER.

If you read my tweets from this morning, you know that I absofreakinglutely adore this guy for what he did in the match against England today. I think he is Germany’s future. He can keep himself in check and not crack under pressure. He’s fast when he needs to be, and despite my initial criticisms about how he plays way too eagerly, I realized that that’s not something to criticize. He goes after the ball, and he’s damn good at making things happen. It’s like he can find all these openings that no one else can.

This guy is going to do amazing things for Germany in years to come. As long as he keeps his nose clean. And doesn’t start acting like a major doucheface like Cristiano Ronaldo -gag-

TRUE TALENT. AHHHHHHHHH yeah. I still love Podolski and Klose, but Ozil is fucking impressive.

That Mueller guy did work too. I’M PROUD.

Like this German team is so freaking young and at the same time so apt and mature, and they are remarkable at maintaining their composure. I really like what Klose said after the match. England did look like the better team based on its lineup and its big stars, but you know, France has good players too, and look what happened to them.

NOW… I know that the goal by Lampard was indeed a goal. You would have to be an idiot to not see it. I kinda panicked when I did first see it because I was pretty sure it was in, and then I took a deep breath, and suddenly the commentators were saying that it didn’t count because it didn’t cross the goal line.

As much as I love Germany, that was a really shitty call. Yeah, Germany would’ve won today in the end, no matter what, but really?

There are going to be plenty of people who say that it was just one goal, but that one goal was an equalizer. And that does WONDERS for a team’s confidence, yeah? So I definitely agree with what Capello said, England’s entire tactical strategy would’ve changed. They would’ve played differently. And it would not have been that bad of a beatdown for England.

I feel for England.

I would also like to note that David James sucked majorly huge testicles at goalie today. HONESTLY MAN. Capello’s dumb for not trusting Joe Hart as goalie. I say that not as Joe Hart’s future significant other (HAHA) but as someone who actually wanted England to do well today. David James was mediocre, and he failed to block some shots. I think it’s his age… like he doesn’t feel as invincible as some 23-year-old confident douchelord, even though that’s exactly what he needed to do. Goalies cannot show weakness. At all. Ever. Just don’t do it.

BUT NO, DAVID JAMES JUST DECIDED HE WAS GONNA SUCK.

I guess I’m just bitter that I have to wait another four years to see my baby in action 😦

Okay, I’m just being plain mean now.

I don’t like Capello. Have I ever established that? After reading this article, I disliked him even more. I know Machiavelli said it was better to be feared than loved, but I don’t agree. Well… no, I kind of agree. As a manager, you have to assert authority, obviously, or no one’s ever going to listen to you. And Capello showed his authoritative side. I mean, I feel like the English could’ve suffered the same problems as the French, except when Terry came out and started criticizing Capello, it was like the iron fist came down and declared Terry an imbecile and a traitor. And Terry came out looking like a total jackass for trying to begin an insurrection against the manager.

I don’t know if Capello should continue to be the English manager. I’m just saying. I mean if the ends justified the means, but they don’t…

Germany/Argentina on Saturday. I did not want to see this matchup in the quarterfinals. Again. It’s unfair to see either side go home so early. I mean this is like a game you should see in the finals.

I feel like Argentina still remembers the loss from four years ago, and they’re gonna start strong. But I feel like if Germany plays the way it played today, they’re going to take the win. And if it’s penalties… LORDY, I hope Neuer is as good as Lehmann was, even though I know he’s not. But I hope he’s been doing his homework at least. Argentina no es bueno at penalties, remember that 🙂 and Germany’s got the best record.

Hi, referees need to stop sucking so much. FIFA needs to come out from under its rock and realize that technology is here, whether they like it or not, and teams are being subjected to many injustices because of their stubborn refusal to come to terms with gadgets like – WAIT FOR IT – cameras.

Goodness I am so excited for the match on Saturday.

Like seriously guys, I’m sitting here typing this up, and I want it to be Saturday so bad. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Like I said earlier, sorry I blabbed about soccer for a whole post. I gave y’all fair warning.